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“I Love You More Than Coffee.”

Let me explain with a personal story of struggle … one that may help you with some difficult things you’re dealing with.

As many of you know, two years ago, we adopted the cutest, sweetest puppy.  He’s filled our lives with laughter and delight.

He was supposed to be hypoallergenic.

Not so.

He’s created absolute havoc with my allergies and exacerbated asthmatic symptoms that had been nearly non-existent for three years!

I’ve searched high and low for answers.  Tried all the typical protocols, as well as a whole slew of natural healing methods.

I finally find the #1 expert on the subject in the US, who teaches at the UNC School of Medicine in Chapel Hill.  I’m excited to have my second consultation with him, where I get the results of the 51 blood tests he ran.

I’m highly expectant.  I’m confident he can help me.

It’s clear he’s knowledgeable and he patiently explains what he sees and what he’s recommending.  I’m feeling great!

… until we get to my food sensitivities.

For the last six or seven years, I’ve given up gluten, corn, most grains, soy, sugar, eggs, tomatoes and other nightshades, as well as a whole host of spices most people would never consider a problem.

But now, he tells me I have to eliminate rice, oats, and dairy products.

Dairy products!  Cheese!  Yogurt!

And yes … even coffee! 


I barely hear anything he has to say after that!  Might as well just take away the sun and spring flowers while you’re at it.

Give up dairy and coffee … my two favorite things in the world!  We’re going to Italy for two weeks next month, and this Italian girl was already imagining all the wonderful things she’d get to eat.

I’m in a world-class breakdown.  I tell my poor husband I can’t even talk about it, and I leave to run an errand.  I literally had to escape!

There’s a huge fight brewing inside of me.  My five-year old is jumping up and down pitching a fit.  My rebellious teenager is screaming, “You can’t make me!” 

The first thing I do on my errand is buy a chocolate bar … dairy free and sweetened with stevia, of course. I eat the entire thing in the car on the way home!

I’m absolutely miserable … sad, angry, and disappointed … for a solid 24-48 hours.

But, as a coach who challenges herself to “walk the talk”, I know I can’t stay in this place.

I go to my typical sources of inspiration to find the answers I need to dig out of this hole.

I listen to a podcast from my favorite guru of attraction who explains that disappointment is, “… a lack of belief that you can have what you truly want.”  And what I truly want is freedom around my food.

I have to allow myself the possibility of seeing that once my body’s extreme over-reaction is calmed down, I can indeed add some of my favorite foods back in.

I have to see that as a possibility in order to get to the stage of acceptance … the acceptance I need to make this drastic change.

Right now, I can’t believe I’ll never drink an espresso with cream or eat my favorite “fat bombs” for breakfast, because they have a hint of dairy.  I can’t go there.

But I can go to giving these up today.

I can give them up this week.

I can even see myself going 30, 60, maybe even 90 days.  And, eventually, I come to accept that I could even do this in Italy.

I look at my puppy, who I love more than words can convey, and I tell him, “I love you more than coffee!  I love you more than cheese!”  Just because it makes me feel better.

Here’s the bottom line.  Whenever we’re dealt a hard blow, we need time to recover.  We actually need time to act out and be rebellious for a day or two.  That’s okay.  Allow yourself some time to process.

Realize that acceptance happens in stages.  One day at a time.

And I remind myself that there are so many folks in this world who are dealing with far bigger problems than severe dietary restrictions … things that would make my problem seem miniscule.

As of this publishing, it’s day 13 of my new program.  It’s not fun.  It’s certainly not what I would’ve chosen.  But I can do this.

And so can you … whatever “this” is for you.  You CAN do it too.  You just have to believe in what’s possible for you.

And just about anything is possible, as long as you hold the vision of what can be … and believe it will be so.




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Meet Denise: Denise Hedges is a Business Development Coach and Speaker Coach for small business owners who want to be more comfortable, confident, and successful with their sales and marketing efforts. She specializes in helping them use speaking as a way to dramatically improve their results!