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As a business coach and speaker coach, I’ve long stressed the importance of just being your genuine, authentic self, But I’ve mostly underscored this in relation to meeting folks before your talk and in terms of how you’re “being” in front of the room during your presentation.

But what about after … when you’re done speaking and you’re interacting with the folks as they leave, especially the ones who hang around to get a little bit of more personal time with you?

The message doesn’t change. You’re the same person … before … during … after … always.

I’m sure that seems pretty self-evident and you probably wouldn’t expect anything different from me in terms of advice, so why do I bring it up?

When you do life coaching, sometimes you have to venture down deep … all the way to how someone “sees” the world, because how you see your world conditions your beliefs and your attitudes, which affect how you act in the world.

And when I say “act,” I’m not talking about just your consciously chosen actions. I’m including your subconscious responses and beyond … all the way down to the behavior of the 70 trillion cells in your body.

Albert Einstein was a really smart guy … and not just when it came to physics. Here’s what he had to say about how we see the world?

As a life and business coach, I don’t talk about myself and what’s going on in my world in my coaching sessions … unless somebody asks. And they often do.

At the beginning of our recent call, my client asked me, “What are you up to this week?”

“I’m leaving Friday for a speaking engagement.”

“You must be so excited! I know how much you like speaking!”

“Uh, no … I’m not excited at all.”

Many of you know me as a life coach and business coach, but I also do a lot of training.

We conducted some presentation skills training recently with 14 senior executives at a well-known tech firm.

Great folks, and it went extremely well.

Part of what made it a good training was they’d done a good job of familiarizing themselves with their material ahead of time.

But there were still some stumbles out of the gate … as there always are.

After all, we had them on camera. They were nervous.

And people want to get it just right. They want to be perfect. And so, a couple of folks stopped speaking and asked if they could start all over again.

Of course.
But in an actual presentation, you don’t get to start again. You have to make the best of it when things go awry.

And if that isn’t a metaphor for life, I don’t know what is.

You got that new client. She looks like a great fit. You send off your welcome package and make the initial charge to her credit card as you agreed. Yea!

Later that day, she replies, “I’m not totally comfortable with that 6-month commitment to coaching we discussed. I’d be willing to contract for three months and then reevaluate.”

You know it doesn’t actually serve most clients to expect to see full results in less than six months, but you want to accommodate her needs, so you reply …

“I want you to feel comfortable with me and confident in the process. So, I’ve changed the paperwork to reflect a three-month commitment. We can reevaluate where you are then. I want you to feel delighted with our work together!”

A few hours later, you’re totally surprised to hear: “I’ve changed my mind and have decided not to pursue coaching. I’m not ready at this time. Please refund my fee.”

Wait! … What?

As a life coach, I’ve been privileged to hear the life stories of a lot of people, and I can tell you, without hesitation, the truism rings true. Into every life, a little rain must fall.

You’re in business to make a profit. So, as a business coach, I always look at what your numbers are telling you about how you’re doing and, more specifically, where you’re getting the most return on the time, money, and effort you’re investing.

Numbers?

Yeah, like …

It was a simple exchange, and yet it could have easily sent us down the wrong road.

There’s nothing wrong with using LinkedIn to connect with people who may eventually become customers or clients. That’s clearly a big part of the appeal.

But there’s a problem out there in LinkedIn land, and I don’t want you to fall into a common trap where you turn people off and end up hurting your reputation.

The grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.

– Joseph Addison

Why would this simple thought throw me into a tailspin?

Well, it wouldn’t now.