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When You Know It’s Not Right

There are certain things in life you can never really explain. One of the more mysterious is personal chemistry.

What is it that instantly connects you vibrationally to one person while keeping you hopelessly out of sync with another? I dunno. All I can tell you is this. When it comes to hiring people for your business, it pays to hire people you really click with … people who really “get” you, your mission, your way of doing things.

But how do you know?

Sure, they have to be able to do the job, but people tend to really overvalue credentials and undervalue the importance of someone’s personality, style, and way of being in the world … the more subjective stuff … the stuff your rely on your intuition to clue you into.

What got me thinking about all this was my cleaning lady.

She’s been with me for over 15 years.  She doesn’t just clean my house.  She’s my friend and practically part of the family.  Faced with some life-changing circumstances, she needed to transition out of the job, so she recommended someone she’d heard good things about.

I spoke with the woman on the phone.  I liked her.  We set up a time where she’d work along side my current person, so she could learn the ins and out’s of the job.

Right away, it was clear her level of rigor in cleaning didn’t match mine.

So what do you do when the warning signals are there and you just know you don’t have a good match? Do you listen to your intuition and cut the cord right away … or do you hang in there and try to make it work, because, after all, she’s a good person?

What would you do?

I haven’t always listened to my intuition. I haven’t always heeded the warning signs when hiring “staff” in the past.

Years ago, I hired an office manager, a very nice person with a solid administrative skills resume, who really understood the world of coaching.

I can remember that first day of training her like it was yesterday!  I was completely and thoroughly exhausted!  It felt like hard work.  It was hard work.

We were a serious mismatch in terms of energy, style, and pace. After several months in the job, although we liked each other as people, we came to a mutual agreement that it just wasn’t working and we parted ways.

Fast forward …  I’ve hired her replacement and I’m spending the day training him.  The energy is completely different.  We’re laughing.  Having fun.  At the end of the day, I’m not even tired!  He’s turned out to be such a great team member … a perfect match for my company. Been with us for quite a while now.

So what’s the lesson?  Test drive the people you’re thinking of hiring, whether it’s a 1099 consultant or a full time employee.  Work alongside them for a day. 

Give them an in-basket “test.” Let them perform some of the typical tasks they’d be asked to do … return phone calls, set up appointments, solve a problem or two, work with a spreadsheet, etc. … and see how they go about things and how good the results are.

And, trust your intuition.  If they don’t feel right from the beginning, cut your losses right away.  Although they may improve with training and feedback, my experience tells me they’ll never be exactly who you want and need … and the frustration and aggravation resulting from the mismatch will sap your precious energy.

The new cleaning lady?  I called her right away and politely observed that we didn’t seem to be a good match and it’d probably be best if we looked for someone else. It wasn’t easy to do, but it was the right thing.

I’ve made some mistakes in this area and I’ve learned from them.

I want you to learn from them as well, so you don’t get saddled with people working with you and for you who aren’t a good match.

Makes life a whole lot easier!

Best wishes,


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Meet Denise: Denise Hedges is a Business Development Coach and Speaker Coach for small business owners who want to be more comfortable, confident, and successful with their sales and marketing efforts. She specializes in helping them use speaking as a way to dramatically improve their results!